Page 26 - May-June-July_Life_In_Naples_Magazine

Into my arms

Adoption Reflections

by Jane Cox PhD, ARNP

M y story begins in Mishawaka, Indiana,

where I was born and spent 35 formative
years. As a junior nursing student at
Saint Mary’s College in Notre Dame, I became
interested and pursued international adoption. I
had always felt that I was a caregiver being the
oldest of five children.
My father had served in the Korean War and my
mother had developed blindness due to Retinitis
Pigmentosa. Older relatives called me a “second
mother” and it suited me.
Kim Min Jung, who became Amber Julia Andel,
arrived to be greeted by her new forever family near
Valentine’s Day in 1981. She was from South Korea
and had been living with a foster mother since birth.
Escorts helped transport about 30 children over
on the flight. We picked her up at the airport in
Detroit during a fierce snow storm.
She was an adorable, active eight-month old on Valentine’s Day of 1983. Language was difficult for about a year. Both
who was naturally cautious during the first couple girls were fascinated with their new siblings and made smooth transitions
of days. A pale blue macramé swing was her as time went by.
favorite spot in the living room. It was not long, Time seems to have flown by. Autumn was the first to attend and
however, until she was outside enjoying her swing graduate Saint Mary’s College with a degree in Fine Art. She is now a
and sandbox. videographer who lives in Portland and enjoys traveling the world.
That same year during summer, an adoption The three younger girls each graduated from Florida colleges and
case worker called to ask if I would be interested in have each taken their own paths in life. Amber helps me with day-to-day
being a foster mother for a recently born baby. As it operations of NCH Community Home Care, Ashley is a teacher and
happened, many other potential foster parents were busy raising Carissa, and Aubrey lives in San Francisco while working
away on summer vacation. By the next day, she had for an architectural firm. We all get together for the holidays and often
delivered a tiny, pinkish girl to me who was only during the year.
five days old! Carissa was a temporary name until Over the years, I have been asked if I can recommend adoption to
she became adopted. Happily, after eight months, others. My answer is always and forever YES! Follow your heart and follow
when I asked the case worker if I could keep her your dreams. Open your arms and hearts to a child. Remember this poem
and adopt her myself, she agreed. Her name then which has become well-known among adoptive mothers: Not my flesh
became Ashley Elizabeth Andel and, interestingly, of my flesh, nor bone of my bone, but still, miraculously, my own. Never
her daughter is now named Carissa in her honor. forget, for a single minute. You didn’t grow under my heart, but in it!
Those simple, early years were blissful as we
explored zoos, museums, parks and church events.
When Amber was three and Ashley was two, two Jane Cox PhD, ARNP, is the Executive Director for NCH Community Home
more sisters joined our family. Autumn, who was 10 Care and teaches at FGCU in Community Health and at NOVA Southeastern
and Aubrey, who was two, arrived from South Korea in Advanced Practice Theory and Research.

26 Life in Naples | May • June • July 2017