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ONE

ARMED LIFE

by Rabbi Adam Miller
A lthough I am not a frequent gambler, I understand that
is in our nature, as humans, to seek opportunities that
offer significant reward, with minimal risk. This explains
the allure of games like the slot-machine, the famed one-armed
bandit. At the risk of a few coins, one pulls the lever hoping
for the golden reward. Despite repeated failures, we continue
to play, over and over again. Each time believing that this will
be the one time we find success – as if we are afraid that by not
playing we will miss something great.
A similar risk-reward calculation seems to govern the rela-
tionship we have with electronic devices. For the small risk of a
few seconds of our attention, every vibration, beep and ringtone
offers the promise of a rewarding new insight or interaction.
The result – a new one-armed bandit rules our lives: one-armed
parenting, with one hand on the swing and the other checking
a text; one-armed hugging, greeting friends while reading an
email over their shoulder; one-armed dining, surfing the web digital devices? The risks are greater than we realize, and
while eating; and the very dangerous one-hand driving. We too much of life is passing us by. In the end, no momentary
risk experiencing life around us, for the tantalizing reward of reward gained from an email, text or tweet outweighs the
something different. value of engaging with the person actually in front of us.
This month we start a new calendar year – 2017. In looking This year, go all in – wrap both arms around the tasks
back, how much time did we spend in 2016 living with only and people around you. Create times when flesh and blood
one arm? How many minutes spent learning about the status of comes before silicon and plastic. Consider adopting the
those miles away, while ignoring individuals who stood within idea of technology free time – endeavoring to have some
the same room? How many minutes watching the latest viral hands-free each week, and by that I mean phone free. And
YouTube clip, while the movie of life played all around? for everyone’s safety, let the text or email you receive while
Living a one-armed life, we are never really present in the driving wait until your trip is over.
moment. This means that we are not completely committed to In life, there are no rollover minutes. We cannot bank
any one endeavor, event, or person. Those missed opportuni- our time from month to month, nor recover time spent
ties may seem small – a risk worth taking. But added up over living a one-armed life. Make the most of every minute by
the course of the year – how many hours, if not days have we embracing life with both arms and a full heart.
missed? How have we slowly chipped away at the relationships Wishing you a happy and healthy start to the New Year,
with those around us, questing after the reward offered by our Rabbi Adam Miller

88 Life in Naples | January 2017